Post by modern_myth on Oct 31, 2024 7:55:41 GMT -6
So my debut date has finally been set. 27 October. No idea what’s gonna happen though. We don’t even know which team we’ll be on. But it’s major: the final four will get to face off in a Gold Star fatal four way next Friday.
Do you still remember your first match ever? Mami said it was the first time she saw you wrestle. Said you forgot everything the moment the bell rang. And then you got your ass kicked big time. She even said that’s how you started wearing a mask in the first place because you had to hide your face after you bombed. Yup she thinks she’s a comedian. I didn’t think that was the reason but she insisted. And you know there’s no arguing with her when she gets like that so I dropped it.
Whether that’s the real reason or not, it did get me wondering: how did you recover from that? I’ve been training for a while now but I know it all don’t mean nothing yet until I put the knowledge and skills to the test. And that test is tomorrow. With so many variables up in the air too.
I don't have friends here. Maybe the person I’m closest to is Paizlee? We’ve chatted a few times, or more so she does most of the talking. I don’t mind listening. Sometimes she says strange things I don’t really understand or movie quotes I’m unfamiliar with but the other times I can actually catch her, she’s got good points. Like this one.
“We shouldn’t stress over things we can’t change, right?”
I mean, I try not to stress over these things but it’s hard. Maybe you can relate. I don’t know. You did freeze in the ring during your debut. I also panic like that if it’s too overwhelming. Mami fights and I don’t take flight, I just freeze. And I’m terrified at the thought of possibly doing just that tomorrow. I’ll be the laughingstock right off the bat and shit like that can live with you forever. I don’t wanna be that guy.
Was that why you never called us again?
Or stopped showing up at your final few bookings?
Heard they found you frozen in the hotel bathroom.
Did it all… get too much?
“Mijo, you’ll be okay. You wanted this so go get it.”
The mask you started wearing was your way to recover from that embarrassing night. Why couldn’t you have found something similar to recover from the plague that followed you till your final hour? Did you not want it anymore?
You used to want it so bad that you left home and never came back. Knowing Mami, she probably wasn’t too happy you went in the first place but she still gave you her blessing, didn’t she? She did the same to me.
“I know we’ll do great.”
I don’t have friends but Raya was the first person I spoke to when I got to the Academy. And I’m glad we are supportive of each other going through this.
What about you? Did you have anyone like that? Was Nick exaggerating or were you really alone at the end?
Were you like me? Reserved and take a while to warm up to someone? Maybe sometimes you take too long that they don’t stick around anymore?
Is that why you left first? So it would hurt a little less than when you get left behind.
That’s a cop-out if you ask me. I would never do that. As scary as this all is, I don’t plan to not even try. In fact, I’ll try my best and more out there in the team vs team match. The people who support me and whoever will be my team mates deserve at least that from me. I won’t disappoint them. And I’ll never disappoint myself either. I worked so hard and came this far on my own. And this is just one match in the grand scheme of things. If I don’t take that first step, I’ll never do anything at all.
I don’t wanna be left behind in that way. Not like that.
Still though, I wonder what you would say to me if you were around. If you were in my team of supporters.
Then maybe I could have repaid you the favor and been in yours when you needed it the most.
Do you still remember your first match ever? Mami said it was the first time she saw you wrestle. Said you forgot everything the moment the bell rang. And then you got your ass kicked big time. She even said that’s how you started wearing a mask in the first place because you had to hide your face after you bombed. Yup she thinks she’s a comedian. I didn’t think that was the reason but she insisted. And you know there’s no arguing with her when she gets like that so I dropped it.
Whether that’s the real reason or not, it did get me wondering: how did you recover from that? I’ve been training for a while now but I know it all don’t mean nothing yet until I put the knowledge and skills to the test. And that test is tomorrow. With so many variables up in the air too.
I don't have friends here. Maybe the person I’m closest to is Paizlee? We’ve chatted a few times, or more so she does most of the talking. I don’t mind listening. Sometimes she says strange things I don’t really understand or movie quotes I’m unfamiliar with but the other times I can actually catch her, she’s got good points. Like this one.
“We shouldn’t stress over things we can’t change, right?”
I mean, I try not to stress over these things but it’s hard. Maybe you can relate. I don’t know. You did freeze in the ring during your debut. I also panic like that if it’s too overwhelming. Mami fights and I don’t take flight, I just freeze. And I’m terrified at the thought of possibly doing just that tomorrow. I’ll be the laughingstock right off the bat and shit like that can live with you forever. I don’t wanna be that guy.
Was that why you never called us again?
Or stopped showing up at your final few bookings?
Heard they found you frozen in the hotel bathroom.
Did it all… get too much?
“Mijo, you’ll be okay. You wanted this so go get it.”
The mask you started wearing was your way to recover from that embarrassing night. Why couldn’t you have found something similar to recover from the plague that followed you till your final hour? Did you not want it anymore?
You used to want it so bad that you left home and never came back. Knowing Mami, she probably wasn’t too happy you went in the first place but she still gave you her blessing, didn’t she? She did the same to me.
“I know we’ll do great.”
I don’t have friends but Raya was the first person I spoke to when I got to the Academy. And I’m glad we are supportive of each other going through this.
What about you? Did you have anyone like that? Was Nick exaggerating or were you really alone at the end?
Were you like me? Reserved and take a while to warm up to someone? Maybe sometimes you take too long that they don’t stick around anymore?
Is that why you left first? So it would hurt a little less than when you get left behind.
That’s a cop-out if you ask me. I would never do that. As scary as this all is, I don’t plan to not even try. In fact, I’ll try my best and more out there in the team vs team match. The people who support me and whoever will be my team mates deserve at least that from me. I won’t disappoint them. And I’ll never disappoint myself either. I worked so hard and came this far on my own. And this is just one match in the grand scheme of things. If I don’t take that first step, I’ll never do anything at all.
I don’t wanna be left behind in that way. Not like that.
Still though, I wonder what you would say to me if you were around. If you were in my team of supporters.
Then maybe I could have repaid you the favor and been in yours when you needed it the most.